Things I need to remember to think about.

"what is your purpose in life?"
"What makes you happy?"
"How do you change emotions?"

"the best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched...they must be felt with the heart." -Helen Keller

OK, so im not the best at responding to comments on time and I hope you two stay interested. I promise I will get to them when I get a chance. (Both of you thanks very much for commenting, im so used to just blabbing and nobody makes me thinks, it isn't as much fun by yourself...haha that sounded sexually indicative.) By the way Rachana, if that is your artwork, I am humbled because it is so amazing.

Ok, back to what I was actually going to talk about, happiness. I am sure if you take a look through my blog you will see my ups and downs. A (Dr. Evil style >) "cycle" if you will. Downs suck ass, as im sure you all know, and ups are nice. In the past year, I have had ups that last about as few days and downs that last for a week of two, and the rest is more or less just stress. I figure that much of how we feel is grounded in how we react to our experiences. Take for example what happened to me this morning. I got a small coffee, open the door to my car, or so I thought. The door swung back and hit my hand spilling coffee (hot coffee mind you) all over my hand and car. Now, I can see someone really getting upset about that. What a crappy way to start the day. I got into my car thinking, 'great this sucks'. Then I thought, 'well not really, there is no reason for me to get upset about that.' So I just laughed and went on my way.

Why be angry and upset when you could be happy? That is my goal for the summer. So far, I have had 4 good happy days in a row. Honestly this is a first...and im really excited.

One thing that will always make me laugh are these fun laughing clubs that started in India, we watched a video featuring John Cleese about the brain in psych. The clip can be found here. Very funny


And today I leave you with this:

Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Do one thing that scares you everyday." (Im working on that too, but that is much harder and I have no balls...ask me about it and I can maybe tell you. Those people know who they are.

I say, "Laugh stuff off, be less angry, no reason to (be angry that is). Too much anger and bitterness in the world. Let's be happy."

So sometimes we hide from things, people....ourselves without knowing it. We get lost. If we are lucky, we notice this and break free and become ourselves again, and it is refreshing. The problem comes when we choose to hide, because if we hide for too long and too deep, we won't be able to find our way out. So...sing like an angel, dance like a raver, and show compassion like buddhist. Because only after we find ourselves can we decide what to do with ourselves.

If it doesn't make sense in the context you think I wrote it in, then use it in your own. Because that has no context that I am ever going to tell you... at leas not in the next couple years you nosey bavarian pig. sorry. I didn't mean it : ) (well not the bavarian part).

You are beautiful

"It's the sense of touch. In any real city, you walk, you know? You brush past people, people bump into you. In L.A., nobody touches you. We're always behind this metal and glass. I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something. "
- Crash

So much hate and anger and pain and fear in the world. We all contribute to it, and we know it. So why can't we see it. Is the forest too big? Are we still hiding behind trees? I think it is time to get out of our forts and stop being so dumb. Everybody is and does good and bad. Some people do more of one than the other. So I say we strive to love. Stop yelling and start listening. No more fighting.

For all you smart asses that want to ruin my moment, I'm not saying if someone points a gun in your head to hug him. Probably not the best idea. But say you get in an accident or somebody bumps into you or someone jumps in front of you in a que. Why do we have to get pissed off? Why cant we simply be ok with the fact that they might be having a bad day. Isn't that what you would want them to do? and maybe you cant do that all the time and that goes for everyone. But why don't we try to give the benefit of the doubt to the person who just lost a family member, or just got diagnosed with cancer, maybe once in a while. You you know an equal amount of what the parent that lets his kids run about on the subway has gone through as you do knowing what is in my pocket.


So for the sake of a little peace once in a while (holy crap I sound like a hippie) show some love and compassion. Regardless of their views, sometimes the only thing anybody needs is a little love.



I'd like to begin by saying
"To everyone else, he would always be the boy in the top window."

With that said we know that perception is everything. We basee every conlusion, every action, and every thought we have off of what we think we know and how we percieve things. We can make ourselves feel miserable or excited. See things in good or bad lights. Imagine that the reason he said this or why she said that is for a good or bad reason, then proceding to effect ouf mood. We base our beliefs off of our beliefs. What we slowly develop as children becomes the basis for how we do things later in life. Slowly, every so slowly, our perceptions of people. places, and things change.
The problem appears when we attempt to view another person perspective in its entirety, because it is impossible. To do so would mean living that person's whole lifeover; reliving their pain and sorrow, victory and triumph. We only ever know so little about a person unless they truly open up to you. I have not met a person like that yet that I am comfertable with reciprocating the curtosy. I am waiting. There are people that I am sure are willing and there are people that I would open up to in a second if only they went first. Maybe they are waiting too, but I have tried. It is hard to do and I have started before only to find the river flowing in the wrong direction. So I give up, I'll stay in the shallows and hope my tears will raise the water level.
But we try to understand anyway, and the ensuing frustration causes grief and anger. Many people can't get through this. People like me who have more empathy than should be necessary simply cry. We weep for other people and we bawl at others pain. I am afrad of other people's death far more than my own and I would take harm for so many other people. The hard part comes when I try and justify other's actions in my mind. I know now to simply stop trying because there is no true jutification that will mean anything to me. I just wish I could know.

This is part of my giving up on some things. "But Ill fight like hell, to hide that I've given up" I dont know what it is that makes me upset sometimes, but the best thing you can do is talk. Please talk, tell me stories and tell me about yourself because I dont know you. I dont know any of you. There is no way that I could ever see life from your perspective, but I can always try and see what happens

Love

I believe

I believe that a people are the most important things. This includes health in physical and mental senses, people's rights, and their relations.

I believe that staying healthy is an easy thing to do, and not doing so is only harmful and silly. Why would someone not want to be healthy? Why would someone choose pain, discomfort, and cancer over...well...not. To me it isn't even a contest. I also like to think that vanity has nothing to to with it, but that is not true. Vanity plays a part, but is not the main focus. Staying healthy, not wanting to get cancer or mess up the brain are reasons enough for me. Seriously, why would a person purposefully kill neurons or modify DNA? because it feels good? That is selfish, childish, and plain dumb. If you want to feel good there are several other ways to do so alone or with other people (and not all of them are sexual). In respect to the consequences, is temporary pleasure really worth a damaged brain and various forms of cancer? no.

I also believe that the right to do whatever you want is vitally imperative to people. I have no problem with you doing anything, unless it concerns other people. "Your rights end where your fist meets my nose." (Jefferson right?). So hurt yourself all you want, just keep it away from me. In related news, the president will be making a speech on the 5th supporting the anti-gay marriage amendment in the U.S. Constitution. The government is willing to create a constitutional amendment that simply discriminates against certain people. They have no right to do that. Currently, Marriage is defined in the major dictionaries as being referenced by the bible. We are basing the meaning of a word off of one person's interpretation of the Bible. Don't even get me started on my problems with the Bible. Do NOT try and argue the Bible's validity. It is a collection of stories, some of which may have had some historical events that happened, most of which more likely are simply fables encouraging good and condemning bad. It is a story book that was written 2000 years ago. So there. If you are literally interpreting the bible, I will literally interpret fantastic ideas like the sun revolves around the earth and the world is flat and Japan was created by some mud falling off of a stick. What? these are not true you say? prove it. Oh, you have science? then why doesn't it apply to the bible? don't believe me yet? Watch Penn and Teller's bullshit on the bible. You will have to rent the DVD as both Google and Youtube have removed it from their sites as far as I can tell. Conservative __________ (fill in the blank with the profanity of your choice) I hope you see the importance of rights. Do what you want, just don't hurt me or my friends, or my family.

I believe that by ourselves we are nothing, together we are everything. I need family and friends, and I care for them. Communication is key here. So tell people how you feel. and if the above hold true for your state, I will listen to you and try and help. I love you all. ALL OF YOU. I can help some more than others and I will do my best. Talk to me. Choose me. Lean on me. Because I will need somebody to lean on soon enough. Hug me, sit with me, cuddle, drink warm drinks, be cozy. Don't be dumb.

Everything in life is your choice. In all honesty, no choice can be made for you unless you let them. You may be placed in very inopportune situations, but it is all up to you and I know you can do it. I'm not really referring to anything there, but I know you can do it. Whatever it is you want to do.

I love you all