The reason I avoid writing is because I become consumed by it. It eats my life and my time. Please read the example below.

Good Evening Citizens of the World,

Tonight I would like to present the issue of social responsibility in the media. Specifically in television. I, like many others, watch TV every so often and I enjoy it. The other day I noticed, after watching Battlestar Galactica, that I have been reflecting upon topics that are presented in the show ranging from genocide to biracial tensions to martial law to religious tensions. During the show I find myself thinking about what I would have done in that situation, how I would have handled it. I certainly would not have allowed the circle of peers to enact vengeful murders on people that maybe deserved it. I certainly would not have endorsed suicide bombings. I, as President of the Colonies would have done the exact same thing as Mary McDonnell's character because she is incredibly cool..and kinda hot. I know how not to commit treason. I know how not to think I am an alien species. Unfortunately, in most situations that I will face in my life, I will not have a chance to employ my new skills.

With that in mind I would like to zoom out and remind everyone about a little bit of child development. One prominent theory in child development is the concept of modeling. A child will watch someone do something and imitate that behavior. This includes both technical skills and social skills. Here's an example: A family is in a restaurant and there is a discrepancy about the bill. The parent reacts to this by yelling and being very angry about it. The child observes the whole things happen. Later that week the child is in the lunchroom at school and yells at a staff person for not serving him the correct thing. A social tactic he had obviously learned from his parent.

It is no question that children are watching more and more tv these days. With reason too! There are so many high quality, interactive, artsy, educational programs out there its unbelievable. Oh wait, that was a dream. Let me rephrase, there are so many masturbatory, dopamine extracting shows out there it's no wonder kids are glued to the tube. In our culture, it is more and more often that a child will grow up with fewer real life role models. Their parents are working more, they live in more separated places, they are eating more and playing less. TV is the babysitter. The more I learn about child development the more and more amazed I am with how powerful and adaptive the brain is, especially when it is young. More importantly than how much TV kids watch, young kids and adolescence alike, is how much it influences them. How much a person is influenced by the media is dependent on how much that person identifies with what they are absorbing.

Before I rant more I want to clarify a term I am going to use: Big Media. Big Media refers to the oligopoly of corporations that have complete control over all aspects of media including but not limited to news, entertainment (music, movies, shitty magazines), and information (Internet, books, etc.). I will admit that I am in now way an expert in communication studies or media culture, but I do know that all of media (with the exception being some independent tubes of the Internet and local newspapers and things) is owned and controlled by an oligopoly of companies that, believe it or not, was founded by immigrants such as Adolph Zukor(Hungary,founder of Paramount), Samuel Goldwyn (Warsaw , founder of MGM--on a side note, Zukor and Goldwyn were brother's in law. Goldwyn helped Zukor start paramount but disputes led to his leave and eventual creation of MGM), Carl Laemmle (Germany, Universal Studios), and Harry, Albert, Sam, and Jack Warner (Poland, obviously founders of Warner Bros.) These companies, which if you have seen any movies ever produce the majority of mainstream films. Here is a breakdown of who owns what:

Media Group <- Subsidiary of or high majority of ownership by

Dreamworks, MTV Films <- Paramount
New Line Cinemas <- Warner Bros.
--------------------------------
Paramount <- Viacom
MGM <- Sony
Warner Bros. <- Time Warner Inc.
Universal <- NBC Universal
--------------------------------
NBC Universal - General Electric

And pulling from the example I started with
Battlestar Galactica is a joint venture between Sky One and The Sci Fi Channel
Sky One <- News Corp (see below)
Sci Fi Channel <- NBC Universal

So there you have it folks. Some of the biggest players in Big Media (The others being Disney, News Corp. (owners of myspace; CEO is Rupert Murdoch), and CBS. If you are interested see stopbigmedia.com or check out Free Culture by Lawrence Lessig)

The point of all this is that what I watch, read, and listen to is controlled by a boardroom of old white men who are interested in the preservation of their companies and their company's image. Now I know people will say, "what about shareholders and their input or watching independent channels" or whatever crazy activist way of trying to take down big media they might be advocating to which I would respond yeah, it exists and it might work in some places, but it never gets rid of the fact that what is on the television and in the movies is completely controlled by a boardroom of old white guys...that either have lower ratings or receive a letter from a concerned viewer. Through an exhausting chain of people, a tv show or movie will be created, carrying whatever ideas and themes it may, that inevitably contains emotionally provocative material to entice viewers to watch it. "If you focus on the meanings, you might miss the selling points and nobody will watch it." So why think too much about what message you are selling until you get it sold? Because after it is sold it is too late. You can not erase something a person has seen or heard or thought about without extensive help from either an awesome rogue militia group or the government (different story)....or if you are the thought police.

All in all, those who have the power to influence the masses are also the ones who should be held responsible for the quality and content of the messages they are selling. In times when people are most influenced by the messages they hear from friends, family and other sources (...media!), also taking into account that people learn and imitate more of what they identify with and that the goal of media is to create things that people will buy and consume (things they identify with) it is vital that those messages present and reinforce behaviors and ideas that are socially constructive.

Thank you, and have a good evening.


BiteCite me
Wikipedia
stopbigmedia.com
FEILITZEN, CECILIA V., LINNE, OLGA. (1975). IDENTIFYING WITH TELEVISION CHARACTERS. Journal of Communication, 25(4), 51.

Ambition is a good idea but not much more,
people lose ideas because they are insubstantial,
they feel insubstantial guilt about not holding onto their ambition;
more importantly, my egg sandwich is going bad!

The Meaning of What!?

Earlier this year I attempted to answer, or at least begin to answer the question, "Who am I?" After talking with several people and thinking about this at great length I have come to the definitive conclusion that I need to spend some more time thinking about it. In fact, I have not gotten very far; however, I will attempt to go through my thinking process so far. I figure, start with what you see.

The Body
The human body is an amazingly complex system of chemicals, organism, and carbon structures that interact at ridiculously fast speeds. More specifically, our brains are continuously in the process of creating and refining neural pathways that are essentially the most unique part of the body. Sure DNA is unique in people, but I would think that the way a persons brain is mapped is much more flexible and variable than DNA.

Ok, so I don't think that that is the best way to approach it, but it's at least a start. From here I often move into what makes someone unique in comparison to other people. One thing that is unique I have already hit which is the exact composition of a person's body. Brain, genes, etc.

One of the other things that I think definitively distinguishes one person from the other is the series of experiences that they have been through. Think about it. A person is born to a particular situation. Both parents, one parents, a village, siblings (or not), pack of wolves, you get the idea; and they are raised in accordance with them. No one person can have exactly the same experiences as another. There are an infinite number of combinations of experiences that any given person can have. It's unimaginable!

I 'spose whats next is to delve into the world of morals and beliefs, as they are ultimately the result of the combination of neural and environmental influences. This is the part that philosophers and scientists go nuts over....especially the squirrel scientists and philosophers (sorry, that was a cheap nut joke....one might even call it a bad nut). I'm not really in the mood to even attempt getting in to what that involves, free will, morality, self-centrism. No, instead I am going conclude with a conveniently broad and thought provoking quote from I <3 Huckabees :

"How can I not be me?"

The American Dream

So, I never new it, but the American dream created by mostly Jewish immigrants film moguls getting rich. The underdog, finding your dream, all of the good ones. I also just noticed after watching a trailor for the film Meet the Robinsons that these movies definatly carry a feeling with them. I don't know what it is, maybe hope? But is definatly something that starts days. What I am worried about is that it is the kind of feeling that can only be let down. A feeling, given by these movies of underdogs rising up and making it give me this funny feeling that I can do something. Maybe its the American Feeling: If you work harder enough, you can do anything accompanied by that hope that everything will work out in the end. Unfortunatly, the American Feeling is invariably accompanied by the American Letdown: If you don't make it you didn't work hard enough, it is all your fault. That is completely untrue in my opinion, but it can be this terribly degrading feeling.
What I am trying to dcide right now is if the AF is a bad thing. Working hard, having hope, are those things bad? I hope not, because I love those movies. I love the American Feeling.

Which is worse:

Love without lust or lust without love?

Edit: >.<>.<

So, I know that I'm being a little emo and artistic here, but hang with me ok? I made some art:

Hyperactive Analyzation Disorder Regarding Interpersonal Magnetism

I've said things like this before, but I will try to word it in an exciting new way for you. Our minds move at fucking incredible speeds every second. Over the course of a minute someone can think of puppies, death, sex, taxes, aqua teen hunger force, terrorists, music, sex, movies, boyfriends, Africa, girlfriends, being stupid, friends, and nothing; and that's just the top 10% of the iceberg (now that I am in college I use fancy things like percentages...that is the correct amount of iceberg that sticks out incase you didn’t know). Now think how many seconds you have been alive and all of the different things you have thought about. Now think of all of the things you have done. It is incredible isn't it? What’s more, you are truly unique in what you have done and there is no possible way for anyone else to have the same experience you can. However, people can have similar personalities.

From here I want to pull a few things: uniqueness, thinking speed, and personalities. This really doesn’t have anything to do with V day, but more what's going on in my life. One thing that I have noticed, not just with this but with everything, is that I (and I am sure other people do this too!) take all of these experiences I have had and project them onto others when we don't know them. We think about the future in the only way we can, which is by bringing to mind the first thing we think of. Daniel Gilbert talks about this his book, but I’m just getting there and I haven't read it lately. Anyway, in my situation I have had a recent encounter with someone that I thought went well. In any case, since then I have created many many different possible emotions to possible reactions. It's like preparing for the future. We like to be prepared, no matter how much we like surprises, we like to be prepared. Additionally, I have made millions of guesses at personality and lifestyle because I don't have anything to base it on. I feel like a really debated and hard to interpret scientific concept where any new information makes me rethink EVERYTHING if just for an instant.

My name is Colin and I have Hyperactive Analyzation Disorder Regarding Interpersonal Magnetism

(for people who haven't gotten it yet, I over think EVERYTHING and more)

So. so you remember those funny plastic ball things with the holes for the shapes? and the shapes were like square, hexagon, circle, and triangle? Now, and I'm sure everyone who goes to anywhere new feels like this, but I feel like I am an icosadodecahedron trying to be pushed where the hexagon goes.

Let me take you trough the whole metaphor. From the outside, the University first looks like one of these expandable ball things things. A collapsed one. And you think oh look at all the pretty colors, they accept everyone and everyone has their place here. It's so wonderful. Then you get here and it opens up. Now it is HUGE!!!!!. Inside this giant ball thing is a variation of one of those other child toys that you put the shapes into. The one I explained above. Except instead of putting the shape into the other ball, you just have to match up the sides. Now, everyone is a polyhedron varying in shape size and what kinds of polygons you are made up of. See this one for example. It has pentagons, rectangles, squares and funky shapes. Each one represents a part of a person and it connects up with the shape sphere thing I mentioned earlier. Now, each person is a polyhedron and each social scene or identity group is a shape sphere (that's what I will call them from now on). So, I'm sure you can imagine what this looks like, many polyhedrons all arranged in a crazy crazy impossible system that links shapes to spheres and people to people.
Just like anywhere you go there are identities ranging from brother sister and child to loner, from drunk to slut to stud, from nerd to dork from, gay to straight, etc. You know what I mean. Everyone one is apart of some group right? and some are more in some groups than others. But, groups don't matter when you are not with other people. In best case scenarios, your social and persona identities don't matter anyway with other people, they are just around you for the sum of those identities.
So, I have questions for readers: what identity of yours do you I identify with most? I was asked that question before and I really couldn't decide. I didn't feel right declaring one more important over others. Each had their special place, and I felt like they were all apart of ME and this funny ME thing was how i represented myself. this social identity grouping shit doesn't work very well because every one's view of their identity group is different and things don't seem to fit sometimes. ... ok I'm not making sense anymore and I'm tired.
Also, Middle and High School seem like these crazy places where people try on identities and find what fits best and then they have some presets to fall on when they go to a new place like Uni(versity, I like the English way of calling it Uni because its faster to type so I will further refer to it as such) and are lumped into identities. Now, there's a whole lot of stuff that can be said about not lumping or being lumped and getting treatment for cancer, but everyone does it (the first two) and I feel strange when people lump me into a group that isn't one that I identify with more than others. Plus, is it possible to grow as a person with out identifying to a major group? and when I see people that I think are well developed and know who they are and they identify with a major group or are well developed in their skill/trade/identity/ whatever, am i lumping them correctly? If you have heard this rant before and can better articulate what I am trying to say please do, even though it is very high school I'm afraid of the world self unsurity melo drama. I would like to know and its driving me nuts....along with the captain's wheel in my pants.

Later

Off the Radar

I just finished watching an episode of Boston Legal.Let me first get you in my shoes, in my frame of mind:

Tonight I want to talk about something not happy.

Tonight I want to talk about something not happy.

The mere fact that I would WANT to talk about something that makes me unhappy seems against what humans are for. I am currently reading Stumbling for Happiness (and Power, Freedom and Grace) in both books, the authors have come to the conclusions that what we want in life is happiness. That is what people look for. Yet here I am, wanting to be unhappy. Not only that, I want to make other people unhappy too. Misery love company, eh? What I want to practice before I get into things is a little visualization exercise. There are going to be three, each taking you to a level of less and less happiness. My goal is to make you miserable. I'm sorry if I offend anyone. here goes:

1) What a great morning! How can it not be? It's your birthday! You look out the window, the sun is just now creeping into the sky, light purple. What a view. The room is a little cold, but the bed is just how it should be. Nice and Cozy. Only one thing missing. Your Partner! and that's when it hits you. Your heart starts racing...not there...you can hardly see...but you can smell, oh you can smell. That strong reeking smell, the kind that can make some people vomit, the kind that could wake you out of a coma: Colombian Coffee. How coffee could make someone vomit you're not quite sure, but you just woke up so who cares? You hop into your brand new slippers andwalk. Past the kids bedroom and down the stairs right into the kitchen where your partner is making breakfast NAKED....wait no, just wearing a shirt that resembles skin color. Breakfast for two as the sun rises, how could this day get any better? With work of course!
Work has never been like this before. Normally most people are gloomy and not looking forward to another day at work, but it seems like a wallmart greeter convention, everyone is smiling and cheery to see you...How strange, its only 8 in the morning! Your desk has a three cards on it, one from your boss, one from Jon(one of your co-workers, he's a sound engineer, funny guy) and the other is from your kids. Poorly drawn, four blobs, two purple, one red and one blue. Thats your family. Right there. How simple. It doesn't matter what you are really does it? You are family, you've got brothers and sisters and...that song hasn't been played in a LOOONG time. This day can't get any better. You're right. It can't. It's 8:46 a.m. There's an earthquake. 600 people die. Instantly, A blast of heat hits you and you see flames shoot out of the stair wells and elevator shaft. The day doesn't get any better. You're in hell, there is fire everywhere, smoke barreling in, breathing is hard. Can't stand anymore. All you need is some air, you need to get out, people are screaming. The card, your family portrait is in your hand which are both obscured by the smoke. You can't see much, all you can think about is crawling towards the light coming in the window. You get there, sitting where you can breath a little and there is only one thought going through your mind. You will never see your family again. You here a voice that sounds familiar. It's Jon! He's running really quick right towards you...not you, the window, he ran right out the window. But it doesn't matter, you will never see your family again. At exactly 10:28 a.m. that is a true fact. Your family will never see you again. In fact, they won't even find you. After they cleared all the debris, you were one of the 24 people that are missing and presumed dead among the 2,973 of 9/11.


2) You walk into the office. As it started, today was not a very good day. Last you had heard, there were an estimated 3,000 dead in the 9/11 attacks. Such a terrible event, you are gld that you are home. But there are more important things on your mind. Even with all this tragedy, you are still here, alive and kicking! It's been so long since you have seen the doctors, they ran a few tests the other week just to show that you were well. Nothing but routine. In fact, for such a dismall day, the office staff seemed to be quite friendly. Even, nice! First time its happened to you! Everyone has their days right?
Dorothy opens the door and calls your name. She had a look in her eye, like she was there for you...to help you if you needed any getting on the scale. now that you think of it, she might be having a good day to. You have a quick chat about how things are and she listens. Boy does she listen. It's such a great feeling to have someone listen to you once in a while. You make a mental note to invite her to your daughter's wedding. This doctor's visit is turning out to be better than you thought. She takes you to the office and instead of having to wait, your doctor is already there. Wow, now thats service. He breathes in deep, then out slow, as if some invisible other doctor had a stethascope on his back listening for any abnormalities. You get into the office and sit down. You tell your doctor how appreciative you are for everything that he has done and that he too is invited to your daughters wedding. Though, you have to stop there because your wife will kill you if invite anyone else. "I'm sorry, there is no easy way to say this. The cancer has spread to your brain and is untreatable."

You won't live to see your daughter get married.

3) Finally, you have to make a choice. Imagine the people you love. Each one lined up in a big long line balancing on puppy dogs and rainbows. Now, put them in a dank cellar with little light and a disgusting smell. much Better. If you had to choose one to torture ruthlessly, who would it be?

All of these are terrible. If you are like me, they make you want to sit down and cry helplessly. They make you feel powerless to do anything, they make you feel emotional pain, they make you suffer.
Now I want you to think about the next couple statements I am about to say. If you are like me, by this point, sad is an understatement. I'm only going to say a few things and I want you to read them one by one, take 30 seconds after each one and try and put yourself in that situation. use what you already know about those things and put yourself in these places:

-thousands of people killed themselves instead of being processed, shaved, striped, worked to death and ovened in the Holocaust

- A doctor who worked through hurricane Katrina said, "I injected morphine into those patients who were dying and in agony. If the first dose was not enough, I gave a double dose. And at night I prayed to God to have mercy on my soul."
"According to statements given to an investigator in the attorney general's office, LifeCare's pharmacy director, the director of physical medicine and an assistant administrator say they were told that the 'evacuation plan' for the seventh floor was to not leave any living patients behind, and that 'a lethal dose would be administered', according to their statements in court documents."

- At one point in time, other human beings were owned as property, bought and sold like sacks of fertilizer, only worth more because they could clear, plant and reap fields, instead of just make them grow better.

These things are worse, so much worse than the stories I gave. but these are even harder to imagine. These are too much more, too distant, too foreign; even some of mine were unfathomable. We don't know what it is like to be in a burning building with no hope of escape, we don't know what it is like to be a doctor, who has given a vow to help patients, after not sleeping for three days, working in a hospital in 100 degree weather without water or supplies. We don't know what it is like to be owned by another person, with no chance or release, no chance of freedom, no chance of escape. Instead, you work 16 hours a day until your body breaks, and then you work until you are told you can stop.

We do not know what it is like. They are bad, they are awful, unfathomable, they are off the radar completely. We don't even have the emotion references to be able to place those kinds of experiences.
When I think of these events, slavery, genocide, death; after the sadness and the grief and the angry, all I have left is love. All I want to do is embrace someone and go on from there, because if we don't keep going....well, then, we flatline.

Special thanks to Wikipedia, and various online news sources for quotes.

I'm sorry that that was so unhappy, so I have found a few things to bring a smile to your face

Edit: Here's some hope for the lost

HAPPY NEW YEAR