Believe it or Not

Everyone believes in something. There is never a time in your life that you are without a belief. In fact, people just can't wait to tell other people what it is that they believe. "I believe in telling other people what I believe." You see, humans are talkative, and we need other people to know that we aren't all just bar stools waiting to be sat upon. So we believe. Honestly, I don't see any other reason for us to take a position on any topic except to prove that I am different than you are. You say that I look good in green, I say that I look good in red. You say that our war on terror is going well, I say that I would rather see the soldiers home and in good health.

Look at it this way, if we all agreed on the same things, the universe would cease to exist. Simple as that. See, it all starts by all of us agreeing that we agree on everything. Which is then followed by "hot" topics like homosexuality and abortion laws, which are of course ruled, in favor of everyone, unanimously. Talks then proceed to other countries. The world ends up deciding on the best way to run itself and lives in harmony with amazingly expanded fields in science and philosophy. Then some morning, every philosopher agrees that since they can't prove that they are any different from each other, they are all the same person. We will call herm (him + her = herm), being every human in existence of course, Dana (because it is used on both sexes). So Dana also begins to think about the universe, and how it compares to herm and herms world. Dana realizes that since shhe (she +he = shhe) agrees that the universe is both expanding and contracting, it is standing still. Unfortunately, that calls for a new theory on universe creation. This is easily done considering Dana's mass efficiency in doing...Anything. So it is stated that A long time ago, many small people called 'hyumens' came together and agreed to set aside their differences and work towards common goals. Dana is the result. In the end, Dana agrees on all matters concerning anything from bananas to lipstick, to stars, to high heels. Unfortunately, Dana is unable to prove that shhe is an animate object because there is nether to tell herm so. So, Dana turns into a barstool and there shhe sits....Waiting....for a butt.

Well, I believe many things.
I believe that self-perception is mostly influenced by other people
I believe that women think too much
and I believe that people are naturally blind and close-minded

but then again, I also didn't believe that I would spend 26.5 minutes writing a completely pointless story when I need the sleep....so just think of the possibilities!