so, im in French classright now. before lunch the Frau used her cow bell and the bell rang. When the bell rigns group C of the student population is herded to the feeding grounds to eat their lunch for a prealotted amount of time. THen another bell is rung and that group is herded again to their designated rooms.If any of the cattle...ahem...I mean students try to leave before hand, they are pushed back into the masses by use of cattleprod...ahem... verbal command.
This is just one example that I thought up today of how regulatedour lives are. For myself I wake up at a certain time everyday to work out or something of the like for a certain amount of time. Then I haveschool for 6 hours. School is broken up into 90 minute blocks with 6 minute passing time and 30 minutes for lunch. Then I leave todosome after schoolactivity for another certain amount of time, go home, work on homework, eat dinner, and sleep for 5 hours or so. Then I get up at a certain time everyday......... and so on.
Life is really boring...if you just look at the basics. Unfortunatly the human is somehow capable of making complecated, even those most basic of concepts. I agree that the human mind has advanced, an unfortunate side effect of this is that we complicate things as well. People can complicate things as simple as what kind of cloths they are going to wear.
I have also noticed that the reason people complicate things is because of other people. Why do you care what you look like? because other people are going to see you. Why do you care how you act, because other people will watch you. Why do you care what you do in school or for the community? because other people care. The only reason that people do anything is because of other people. Why do you have a job? To pay other people for letting you be taught or having a house or car, etc.
I wonder if cows have the same depth of mind. Is the only thing cows think about is what they are eating? Hmmm this grass is alittle dull, I better go over there. Or is it more complicated than that? Do the cows get upset because their hooves don't match their spots? Do they have social groups and other cows they look up to? Or is it all just about the grass?
Mmmmmmm, this grass tastes great!.... I mean talk to you later...........yeah
So quiet
another wasted night,
the television steals the conversation
exhale,
another wasted breath,
again it goes unnoticed.
Yeah. So, everyday i see you, i notice things that I haven't before. Why i notice these things; why im even looking at you is beyond me. But I have begun to remember how you first entered my life...
Through a dream
Everyday, I saw you in the hall, since freshman year. EVERY SINGLE FRICKEING DAY. Why did you die in that dream? i dunno. but what i do know is that because of that dream, you appeared into my line of sight and have dramatically affected my life.
Please tell me you're just feeling tired
cause if it's more than that I feel that I might break
out of touch, out of time.
Please send me anything but signals that are mixed
cause I can't read your rolling eyes
out of touch, are we out of time?
Each time I saw you, you looked different. You are a well known person that I don't know at all. You didn't even know that I exsisted untill we just happened to be in the same class, and sport. Even then, you didn't see me.
T'wasn't untill I finally started leaving weak remarks hinting towards the fact that i saw you everyday, watching your every move. Adoring you in a sort of crazed freshmany sort of way.
Close lipped
another goodnight kiss
is robbed of all it's passion,
your grip
another time, is slack
it leaves me feeling empty.
Even today, when you know that you have become a kind of sybol for what life is to me, you don't have a difference. Which I guess is normal, it just feels wierd. What I have for you now is not the same as before. Tis no longer a kind of adoring, but admiration, for what you do, and how you think. Yet, still I notice things, why I don't know...nice new sweater.
I'll wait until tomorrow
maybe you'll feel better then
maybe we'll be better then
so what's another day
when I can't bear these nights of thoughts
of going on without you
this mood of yours is temporary
it seems worth the wait
to see your smile again
out of the corner of my eye
won't be the only way you're looking at me then.
Once again, Thanks Bob Dylan
you
you no longer hold the position of idol, i dont think you ever did. I was just to blinded to see you for what you are.
a symbol
you are not the things I idolize, but you are a very good walking symbol of them....still unfortunatly, the mere sight of you sends a shrill through my spine...in a good way...?
|
You Are From Neptune |
 You are dreamy and mystical, with a natural psychic ability. You love music, poetry, dance, and (most of all) the open sea. Your soul is filled with possibilities, and your heart overflows with compassion. You can be in a room full of friendly people and feel all alone. If you don't get carried away with one idea, your spiritual nature will see you through anything. |
|
You Are a Warrior Soul |
You're a strong person and sometimes seen as intimidating. You don't give up. You're committed and brave. Truly adventuresome, you are not afraid of going to battle. Extremely protective of loved ones, you root for the underdog. You are picky about details and rigorous in your methods. You also value honesty and fairness a great deal. You can be outspoken, intimidating, headstrong, and demanding. You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others. Souls you are most compatible with: Old Soul and Peacemaker Soul |
|
You Are the Reformer |
|
1 You're a responsible person - with a clear sense of right and wrong. High standards are important to you, and you do everything to meet them. You are your own worst critic, feeling ashamed if you're not perfect. You have the highest integrity, and people expect you to be fair. |
My life is rated PG...?
What is your life rated?
I look to it for strength,
I look to it for confidence.
I look to it for courage,
I look to it for bravery;
why can't I look to you?
I look to it for ego,
I look to it for humility.
I look to it for a reason,
I look to it for an excuse.
you weren't there for me to look to you.
I look to it for nothing,
I look to it for everything.
happness, sadness, excitment, boredom
where were you?
I look to it with resentment,
I look to it with appreciation
It is there to look at,
you aren't
"I am the Lord," he said. His bandanna was damp. It was hot and he wished it would rain.
The orange thread poked out from the edges of his machine. It was still long. This was good. He lowered the machine's head into the grass and it buzzed steadily. He did not pull the throttle. His hands and arms hurt from the vibration and he wanted to catch his breath. The grass did not know its time was near. It did not understand what the sound of an engine meant. The sound meant he was making things beautiful again.
His orange thread hung motionless among the high grasses.
His sunglasses slid down his face and he pushed them up. He was alone. They would not pick him up until after lunchtime. He pulled the throttle and heard the high whine.
"I am the Lord," he said, severing the high grasses.
by Matt Demo
I think the best a part about humans is that we can control our body, in all functions, using our brian. Wow that sounded very....dumb didn't it! But im serious. Mind over matter. One can lose wieght just by wanting to. This also goes for over coming desieses. The hard part is learning how to use this art of your brain. I have heard and read in many places that meditation, both active and unactive help this. One of the most common being Tai Chi Chuan. AND GUESS WHAT. TAI CHI AT THE REC BABY!!!!!!
Today was really fun.
I got out of bed really late because my alarm clock has broken and I cannot afford a new one at the moment.
I feel a bit strange because we've just moved to Idaho and there's a weird smell in the house.
I'm so normal
Last night I had to go and pay Joshua's bail. He's such a jerk. He got arrested for punching the Walmart clerk in the face for refusing to sell him beer. He's only 16!
I want to tell the world that I love you all! You're all so special to me!
I am updating this journal for the first time in ages, because I've been in prison.
Today, I got a digital camera! Yes! Here's ten thousand photographs of my cat.
I want to say thanks to the academy for giving me this award.
I went to the doctor yesterday, and he said I have bipolar disorder, which makes me different enough to be interesting, but the same as all the other cool people with bipolar disorder.
You should all do this quiz! It's amazingly accurate. You just put in your name and birthday, and it will tell you you're a moron.
Thee words have been brought to you by "Gregor's Semi-Automatic LiveJournal Updater"
That's enough for now. But I'll leave you with this poem I wrote. It's about my friend Robert, who has bipolar disorder. Just like me. And Heidi.
Created with the Gregor's Semi-Automatic LiveJournal Updater™. Update your journal today!
Powered by Rum and Monkey
So long sweet summer,I stumbled "According to the seed that is sown,upon you and gratefully basked in your rays.So long sweet slumber.So is the fruit you reap.I fell into you now you're gracefully falling away.The door of good of will gather good results.Hey thanks, thanks for that summer.It is cold where your going The door of evil reaps evil results.I hope that your heart is always warm.I gave you the best that I had.If you plant a good seed well,You pased on my letters& passed on the best that I had.Then you will enjoy the good fruits."
Not too sure if I have done this one already....oh well!
| LOOK OUT! ïòð |
| Colin is a radioactive squirrel!! |
From Go-Quiz.com
Well, u-- um, can we come up and have a look?
What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
So, ive been watching the people at my school latly, and it's kind of funny. Not just the people at my school, but people in general. The majority of people, let their emotions get in the way of everything. They let their emotions blind them. So someone gets mad, and they are completely oblivious to everything except the single thought they are thinking. It's like they lose sight of everything, and their minds can only process one thing at a time! People need to learn to control their emotions, including myself. I am proud of myself becuase I was getting pretty agrivated, and i managed to srug it off in a matter of minutes. It feels godd when you do something right. The hard part is acctually doing it.
I think that the trick s to step back, and look at how much this wil acctually effect everything. Say I was pissed becuase i didn't want to do something, and someone made me do it. Let's say that I just hated what I had to do and got really pissed. The kind of anger where you want revenge. I know, most of the time you know how to stop being mad...you just dont want to! Well, Just take a few seconds and think, if I went around people and was like "I'm really pissed at this person, I hate them!!!" What would everyone think?? im sure they would think lower of you. Now I'm not the kind of person that is like, oh I care what everyone thinks about me. There are a few people who influence me whom I look up to, but not many.
I do care how ever, how people persive my attitude. Attitude is the most contagious of our emotions. If you are angery at someone, and you express it publically, then people usually take one of two sides. First, there is the "I'm with you side. Yeah I agree, that person sucks. He/she is a terrible person. What they did to you is awful!!" etc., you get my drift. Then there is the sid ethat just thinks your a worse person. "Oh jeez, there he goes again. He needs to stop hating people...." etc...again you get my drift.
So just try to avoid these kinds of things in the future.
Peace.
Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant!
"May barbarians invade your personal
space!"
You are highly confrontational and possibly in a
bad mood. You would have sworn in this quiz,
if I had made it an option.
Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
ah
ahhhh
a
h
ahhhhh
1 MORE HALF DAY!!!!!!!!!!
i cant stand it!!
anyway.... good song = Several Ways to Die Trying by Dashboard Confessional
Anyway, things with the man worked out alright. If you want proof check out his Blurty. If you don't know the address, then you don't need to go there!. haha
peace. love. craps.
see ya!
well, I have been chosen as the 2004-2005 Drum Major. It is a good feeling, but i am sorry for those guys that didn't make it. We all practiced so hard. I am just confused right now. I know that I would have been upset if I didn't make it, but why do people have to hate me? I practiced just as hard, if not harder than other people. My audition didn't go nearly as well as I had hoped, but that's only a part of it. I have been told that my interview was alot of it, and the parts of my audition i didn't screw up on were also good. So why are people trying to make it seem like i was picked by age. I'm not going to mess up at games. By then I will have enough practice where it will be second nature. Again, people make it seem like what I have earned is a bad thing. Man im sorry you didn't get it, but hating me isn't going to do anything. Getting your friends to hate me isn't going to do anything. Hat Mr.L isn't going to do anything. Why don't you guys get that.
I'm lost, help me please. i need a light.
Im not sure if this is true for other people, but I know that in my life, there is one focus point. now its not like any certain things, it is always changing. I tis the things that you wait for, you know the thing that mkaes you get up in the morning and really look forward to the day. At several times, including now, that thing is a person. This person isn't someone i have a crush on or anything like that, it's just someone (more like someones) lthat i really admire. I look forward to seeing these people in my day, and if I dont see them, i get kind of down.
Bleib Tapfer
...I still envy you
You know those movies that are kind of sappy, yet inspiring; where the main character has friends that are really good at stuff. You know, it just seems that the only friends he can make are the ones that can do something really really well, yet he doesn't see anything in himself...
... that's how I feel.....
....I have friends moving away that are awsome in foriegn languages (like fluent in like 5 languages), I have several friends that are extremly musically talented, I have more than enoguh friends that are really really smart, not to mention the ones that are all athletic. Then there are the ones that are really good at being a kid (like those ones that are über community service ones...mine is meeting Tiger Woods to do some sort of commercial, and the friends that are just good at everything in general. Finally, I have the friends that combine half of those togeather with a hint of bad ass and a mint to top it all off...
...I envy all of you
....Yet in myself...i feel empty...not really good at anything...i dont want do be felt sorry for, or pittied of anything, i just kinda feel wierd....I think that...
I need
a...
religion??? (im looking)
My sport...
Crew(krü), n. 1. A sport practiced
in rowing boats where the
participants willfully awake before
dawn and run to practice where
they spend one or two hours
sitting on a hard wood seat
and pull on oars to such a
level as to cause their bodies
to go into oxygen debt, resulting
in the formation of lactic acid
in their blood, which causes
substantial pain and discomfort
in all major muscle groups.
This activity is usually performed
twice a day in the name of fun,
and is conducted under the
demonic supervision of a
person called "Coach",
with the help of his trained
servant named "coxswain".
and now for one of the greatest songs in the historyof all music... BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY !
Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Caught in a landslide-
No escape from reality-
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see-
I’m just a poor boy,i need no sympathy-
Because I’m easy come,easy go,
A little high,little low,
Anyway the wind blows,doesn’t really matter to me,
To me
Mama,just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger,now he’s ,
Mama,life had just begun,
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away-
Mama ooo,
Didn’t mean to make you cry-
If I’m not back again this time tomorrow-
Carry on,carry on,as if nothing really matters-
Too late,my time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
Body’s aching all the time,
Goodbye everybody-I’ve got to go-
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth-
Mama ooo- (any way the wind blows)
I don’t want to die,
I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all-
I see a little silhouetto of a man,
Scaramouche,scaramouche will you do the fandango-
Thunderbolt and lightning-very very frightening me-
Galileo,galileo,
Galileo galileo
Galileo figaro-magnifico-
But I’m just a poor boy and nobody loves me-
He’s just a poor boy from a poor family-
Spare him his life from this monstrosity-
Easy come easy go-,will you let me go-
Bismillah! no-,we will not let you go-let him go-
Bismillah! we will not let you go-let him go
Bismillah! we will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go-let me go
Will not let you go let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no-
Mama mia,mama mia,mama mia let me go-
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me,for me,for me-
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye-
So you think you can love me and leave me to die-
Oh baby-can’t do this to me baby-
Just gotta get out-just gotta get right outta here-
Nothing really matters,
Anyone can see,
Nothing really matters-,nothing really matters to me,
Any way the wind blows....
There are two ways to think about pain. There is one that it hurts and distracts you. It is added wieght to your problems. In that state of thinking, you only become more frustrated, and more angry. It is pointless to give yourself more pain, so why don't you think of it diferently.
I think of pain as body awareness. Im not some self mutalator that hurts myself for fun. no, it just works like this. If I get hurt doing something, for example today I got four open bleeding wounds( one is the size of a dime and the other three your pinky fingernail) and three fair sized blisters from rowing. Now I dont see these pains as added wieght, I see themas things I did wrong that I can fix. When I feel pain, it re-focuses me to what I am doing and reminds me why I am doing it. Pain can acctually be pretty usefull if you think about it right. Well, that is todays shpiel. (the last entry was supposed to be yesterdays...hehe)
I see pain as weakness escaping the body.
-bleib tapfer
You know, there is something really agravanting when a group of people are working as a team, and one of them decideds to not pay attention. That just ruins it for everyone. Everyone works hard to get the job done and one person, just for a second, decides that they aren't going to pay attention... and look what happens...moron
On a lighter note, Something really cool happens in things like a band or orchestra where you have 60 some people all concentrating on the same piece of music, or the same melody. It just is a really cool feeling. What's even cooler is when someone to whom you have respect for plays with you, when you can pick him and yourself out of the band just playing togeather...that is also really cool.
...AAAAAAaaaaaand there is just something about a bike horn that brings a smile to my face, and a warmth to my heart.
Some people think that knoledge and wisdom are the same thing or are just closly related. I think that they are absolutly different. Knoledge, you can learn with out doing anything. You could be the biggest couch potatoe and still have knoledge. That's just the way it works. Wisdom, on the other hand, comes from doing things. It comes from getting out there and acctually watching someone do something, than doing it yourself. There is no imitation for wisdom. The other part of wisdom is age or events. By events I mean a tragic event in your life. For some reason unknown to our race, events like this make us stronger and wiser.
Gotta fly
Es Por Ti
Juanes
Cada vez que me levanto y veo que a mi lado estás
Me siento renovado
Y me siento aniquilado
Aniquilado si no estás
Tu controlas toda mi verdad y todo lo que está de más
Tus ojos me llevan lentamente al sol
Y tu boca me habla del amor y el corazón
Tu piel tiene el color de un rojo atardecer
Y es por ti...
Que late mi corazón
Y es por ti...
Que brillan mis ojos hoy
Y es por ti...
Que he vuelto a hablar de amor
Y es por ti...
Que calma mi dolor
Y cada vez que yo te busco
Y no te puedo aún hallar
Me siento un vagabundo
Perdido por el mundo
Desordenado si no estás
Como mueves tú mi felicidad
Y todo lo que está de más
Tus ojos me llevan lentamente al sol
Y tu boca me habla del amor y el corazón
Tu piel tiene el color de un rojo atardecer
Y es por ti...
Que late mi corazón
Y es por ti...
Que he vuelto a hablar de amor
Y es por ti...
Que brillan mis ojos hoy
Y es por ti...
Que calma mi dolor
The Uber religious people... and how much i them.
Ok, so I can imagine that when people believe in a religion, they are usually devoted to it to some extent. I'm cool with that. Most religions will have a punishment for not believeing in it, thus the believers try to get non-believers to do it too... as a kind of help right? Well think about this religious people. Most people know the major religions, and what they are all about. If they wanted to be in your religion wouldn't you think they would have joined already? Yeah, it just es me off.
Never Underestimating the power of stupid people in large groups
In fact, never underestemate stupid people in general. I just can't stand it when people vandalize things, or hurt other people either for the heck of it, or for fun, or for pop ularity, or for... I could go on. One of the things that es me off the most is when people hurt them selves. , self-mutilation, drinking alcohol. Especially underage drinking. HOLY CRAP MAN!!! There are kids in my area that are poisoning themselves, it just disgusts me!
The Evils of humanity
Getting caught in the moment
Words of advice, don't get caught up in the moment and do something stupid.
It only takes one person to start a group of stupidity
Oh how true that is.
Humans are not very smart as a whole
We have stopped the who natural selection/Evolution thing
Yeah, Darwins theory. By creating things like glasses, and advanced medical breakthroughs, we have stopped natural selection. Take my earlier example of glasses. Before, those with bad eye sight would be (at the most extreme case) eliminated from the gene pool. Thus we would no longer have poorly sighted people. By creating glasses, we have stopped that process and thus halted the Human evolutionary process in most aspects.
bad moods are contagious
Risks are one of the most fun things in the world, the more you will lose if you fail... the more ecxiting it is
YES THEY ARE. That rush of adrenaline, they wager on the table, don't know if you will win or lose....SOOO MUCH FUN! ....untill you lose. he he he
Peace Out
~Colin
it's the new year...
The new crowd, the new school, the new people...
the new freshmen come in...
they get made fun of by the new sophomores because they were when they were freshmen...
.................................................................................................................
the new year...
there was something people did to you...
you said you would never do it...
the time comes when you make the decision...
you give in............................................................................................
they did it to you you have the right.
It happens like that. People do what they have learned, and teach what they do...
This happens in way to many things for me to mention,
i will add things as I think of them..
I just think it's kinda funny
See ya
For now....
(a recently seen quote from this guy i know) peace love and crabs
Is'n't it funny how religion works. I love how it is so obvious yet to some people it seems like some sort of Great Epiphany
So lets say that no religion has proof enough to be concived as absolutly true. Most religions in fact have paltry evidence any way. But let's say that this new religion is called Colonism. It will be inspired by some form of literature of such. Now the creator of the religion really didn't mean to have it happen that way it just did. He said, "Hey, I have an idea that the world works like this!" Great. another person thinks he knows everything, is what some people say at first. Next, people who like the idea, adopt it into thier beliefs. That is where everything goes wrong. With belief. Since, last time I checked, we (or well most of us) are single minded, individualistic beings; we (I will be the idividualistic human stereotype from now on) want to make our own ideas and changes. But, since I already have this one idea, I will just modify it so it suits all of my other beliefs also! Wow, what kind of a loser came up with that one. Now all of the humans that origonally belived in the one idea, now have many to chose from. After a while, the weaker sections (what are now becoming sects) die out. Now let's say that there are 3 prevailing sects. These three all have their own beliefs. One will be based on pacifism, another pessimism, and the third realism. Let's also say that these three are the leading religions in the world. now, as you might guess, they would not agree too much. Let's say that the pacifists are too pacsifist to fight, so they die off. They aren;t killed by the pessimists because the pessimists were too busy speculating what would be the cause of war. The realislists killed them all off because that was how it was. so, great. We just had a war over religion. Soon enough, someone will come up with a new idea, it will split into groups, and the groups will fight. I wonder how long it will take for people to realize this. PLUS! I didn't even mention what happens when two completely seperate religions fight...Oh jeez! i mean that's war!
Tune in again for why it helps to have a brain smaller than the size of your eye! Sime Time, Same place!
~Colin
Sorry about the not writing in a while, man APH really takes alot out of you!
anyway, in responce to David's "Lies of Life"
Please read the entry before you read my response of it won't make very much sense.
Maybe the reason we forget all of those good memories is because we need to make room for new ones. It is in our genes. There is something in our brain that makes us forget something that felt realy good so we would go out and do it again. Tus no longer having the need for that old memory because we have a new more recent feeling.
It is kind of like somking marijuana (Shame on me for saying this , but it is very true)(oh, and by the way i don't know this from experience...I'm just resourcefull) The reason people get addictied is because when they take thier first hit, it feels really good. I'm not joking. It stimulates your brain for a small amount of time. The catch is no matter how hard you try, you will never be able to get that good of a hit again.
You are probably right, David. We do make things up and insert them in our memories making them a kind of semi-realistic fantasy. Now, there are some people who will give up at this point and say, "It will never be that good again so why try." That (not being sarcastic) is the way alpot of people feel. On the other hand there are people who say, "Well I don't quite remember if hat is how I really felt so I guess I will have to try to find that point again and prove to myself that I felt that good." That kind of attitude is what keeps people striving in life for more. Those are the very succesfull people. They are the ones that know what to do in life and when; because their whole life they have been adventuring out to see what they can do and to do better than what they just did. (Please re-read that run-on sentance if you need to)
well......I was going to write more about some other stuff.....but then i ate some food. Now I don't feel like writing, so what I have will just have to do.
Untill next time....
Commander Lock: Dammit, Morpheus! Not everyone believes what you believe!
Morpheus: My beliefs do not require them to.
Peace
Fear
Fear is nothing but fear itself.
Wow
what a dumb line.
Fear is alot more than that. It is a problem, physical and emotional. It interfears with everyday life, and is apart of it as well. We can't just ignore it because that would be useless. It would still be there and it would grow in our subconciences. Like everyone says we need to face our fears. That really works. try it out sometime. well I have fears of my own to face....Peace out
Time for my randomness:
The human race is overall pretty shy. No really, think about it. We have all of these private things because we like to keep to ourselves. i mean there would be few people who would interact with people if we werent forced to (aka work, school, etc.). What's really confuses me is that even though we don't like to share alot of our info, we marry each other.
Man, I wishgirls were easier to fgure out. Wait, I take that back. making them easier to figure out would take the fun out of life. Oh and I love this guys story. He has a girlfriend and I wanted to know how this happend. So he starts his story by saying that they had known eachother for a whole month! Wow that's along time. anyway last weekend he asked her out and she said yes. Wow! talk about moving it quickly! heh peace.
Your right Alex. That test is really accurate. Here you go!
Take it for yourself!
Seer
The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla
To Anne:
Not to be rude or anything, but why do you care who her friends are?You should be more conserned about yourself and your own friends. Last time I checked, you and Emily were friends and then you diss her, and POOF! not friends any more. guess what, if you keep doing that, you wont have any friends left either. Oh, and by the way, people can choose thier own friends whether you like it or not. So please, do us all a favor and shut up about the "you dont have good friends" crap. Thanks Much!
~Colin
Names
What's in a name?
"That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet."
Why do we potect our name, in hopes it will not fall into the wrong hands?
what would they do with our name?
Not much
Probably use it to get money some how.
A name is a poem with out meter
A name is an informational label
A name is our slave and our master for we command it yet it we are bound to it.
We our the ground and our names our flower
it is sewn unto us then we nurtue and grow it.
But do names really matter?
for "I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all togeather."
Yes they are a way to remember your parents and your child hood and...well...everything as a matter of fact.
Names are sweet in the eye of the beholder, and yet rotten to the one who wears it.
So used are we to our own names that others begin to look so good, and the numbers of others are vast.
Yet as the saying goes the grass is always greener, and it is.
So if you ever find yourself thinking that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.....fertilize your own lawn.
On the day of the power outage I was in the shower thinking. We humans have come so far and done so much to be the top. We have trampled everything else. If the property of Yin and Yang is true (and I belive it is) than the humans are going to be in trouble. As I see it, we rule over the world, then fight among eac other and destroy the world. That looks to me like one-sided power. Soon enough there will be some sort of a "great equalizer" that is going to send us bak in time sort of thing and make us equall with the universe. then this power outage hits and I think...stragnge.
~Colin
Does thought really come from the brain... or the soul.
Care and our emotions also come from the soul.
All the brain does is control the body.
Our soul is what contains our character, life force, and personality.
We think, make decisions, and coose the paths of our lives through our soul.
When you die you will still be capeable of thought and you will no longer have a body, but that is a long way away, so think about the road in front of you and know that your soul is pointing you in the right direction.
~Colin
Zen Moments
Overreaching Oneself
Lingyuan said:
Those who overreach themselves in positions of leadership rarely finish anythin successfully. It seems that thier virtuous qualities are superficial and thier measure is narrow, and thier learning from experienceis low. Also they cannot follow the good and strive for righteousness and use that to expand themselves and achieve realization.
-Daily Record
The Chinese have a symbol for the way of life. It is called the Yin-Yang. It represents equality. Equality of everything. Everyone should have equality in their lives. Whether it is in friends, family, or just way of life. Friends, for example,: You should strive to have friends that have the same interests, and some that are the exact opposite. Families should do things that represent their interests, and try new things to expand their horizons. In life, you should do things that are equal opposites. Learn and teach, speak and listen, give and receive. When all is equal, there is no conflict.
Please find peace within yourself.
~Colin
I have a request from two of my friends.
When two people talk, there is an expected courteously and politeness that both people should show no matter the circumstance. Apparently, some people can't handle the fact that if something were to happen between them (say. Breaking up) the same, if not more courtesy should be given and returned. Love and Life are a never ending duel. Duels are played by the rules and have their own form or politeness. Actually, I am tired and can't explain it in any cool metaphorical way. So, Guys, when the kind lady breaks up with you, then calls you and is nice to you; return her kindness and be polite. Not some thick headed mono tone "woe is me" because you have it easy and it isn't then end of the world so shut up and move on with life!
Thank You, don't take any of this personally.
~Colin
one who has a strong soul, purpose, and heart will succed in life. No matter what they do, they will be great. whether they are the knight in shining armor, the mysterious man in the black cloak, or the poor beggar. Whatever they do, they will be the the best at it. This I know. It is written in my heart and my soul, as it should be in everyone. You will be great David, and you will be a legend*. Try not to be what others are, but what the others are afraid to be.
Remeber that and you will go far.
~Colin
*=Heros are rememberd, Legends are not forgotten -Anonymous
want.
.
..
...
wanting to have someone with you at a certin time.
i guess it will only make that time, with that person, when it gets there of course; that much better.
i will wait for that time and and know that i will treause it forever and i will savor every moment of it.
i will be sad when it is over and happy when it happens again.
.
..
...
i will just wait for it then...right here...
.
..
...
wanting it
~Colin
someone (11:18:39 PM): i mean, what if i only like her like i do because shes my first friend? But i dont feel like thats it...BUT I DONT KNOW!
someone (11:18:43 PM): I JUST DONT KNOW
someone (11:18:47 PM): what is ove?
Saline CJR (11:19:01 PM): ove-
Saline CJR (11:19:08 PM): its cutting it off
someone (11:19:44 PM): thats what dating is so ove(cutting it off) it dosent make sense to me
someone (11:20:05 PM): its not a word in the dictionary
Saline CJR (11:20:08 PM): My first "girlfriend" I felt that way as far as I can tell and it was becuase
Saline CJR (11:20:17 PM): dating is so o-v-e- - - - - -
Saline CJR (11:20:18 PM): there
Saline CJR (11:20:26 PM): did it cut it off again
someone (11:20:41 PM): ic
someone (11:20:50 PM): what were you saying about your first friend?
Saline CJR (11:20:56 PM): becuase it was that she was first and I didnt know what else there was
someone (11:21:13 PM): yeah, but how will you know if you dont go out there?
Saline CJR (11:21:20 PM): I am out there
someone (11:21:24 PM): im saying this in question to your rule
someone (11:21:30 PM): maybe
someone (11:21:33 PM): but how do you know!
someone (11:21:35 PM): ?
someone (11:21:38 PM): hmmmm?
someone (11:21:45 PM): how do you know any of this is real?
Saline CJR (11:21:50 PM): someone said to me
someone (11:21:58 PM): how do i know your real
Saline CJR (11:22:01 PM): real is only what we persieve it to be
someone (11:22:02 PM): how do you know im real
someone (11:22:08 PM): EXACTLY
someone (11:22:21 PM): which is why i have trouble believing life
Saline CJR (11:22:25 PM): I persieve that on the other end of this im there is someone
Saline CJR (11:22:33 PM): you may not be you but you are someone
someone (11:22:40 PM): im no one
Saline CJR (11:22:40 PM): THEN DONT BELIVE IT
Saline CJR (11:22:49 PM): NO ONE ELSE CARES WHAT YOU BELIVE
Saline CJR (11:22:52 PM): sorry
someone (11:22:56 PM): ha its ok
Saline CJR (11:23:00 PM): not trying to be mean , just true
someone (11:23:04 PM): i know
Saline CJR (11:23:12 PM): ok good
someone (11:23:14 PM): but if i dont believe in anything whats the point in living
Saline CJR (11:23:28 PM): if you truly belive that then there is none
Saline CJR (11:23:39 PM): please dont kill your self on what I sayd
Saline CJR (11:23:41 PM): said*
someone (11:23:46 PM): of course not
Saline CJR (11:23:55 PM): thx
Saline CJR (11:23:57 PM): anyway
someone (11:24:02 PM): not enough willpower
someone (11:24:20 PM): i cant stop trying to figure out the impossible
Saline CJR (11:24:29 PM): they said to me something about being embaresed when they talked about me and her. If I truly loved someone, then I would have her full trust and her mine
someone (11:24:31 PM): or figure out anything for that matter
Saline CJR (11:24:39 PM): thus I knew that she wouldnt be cheating
someone (11:25:01 PM): she "cheated" on you at this age?
Saline CJR (11:25:03 PM): or if a friend were to joke about hitting on her, I wouldnt care becuase i knew that she is devoted tome
Saline CJR (11:25:05 PM): no
Saline CJR (11:25:15 PM): i didnt love her young grasshopper
someone (11:25:17 PM): ah i see now
someone (11:25:31 PM): theres a problem though
Saline CJR (11:25:39 PM): what
someone (11:25:57 PM): if i truly love her, what keeps her from not loving me?
someone (11:25:58 PM): nothign
Saline CJR (11:26:27 PM): love is not a magnet
someone (11:26:33 PM): I know
Saline CJR (11:26:38 PM): it is not a mathamatical equation
someone (11:27:02 PM): but to be completly honest colin, and i hope you dont take any offense to this, but i dont fully trust anyone
Saline CJR (11:27:05 PM): it's not ballenced. You could love the out of some chick and she could not know that you exsist
Saline CJR (11:27:12 PM): niether do i
someone (11:27:16 PM): not you, my parents, her
someone (11:27:18 PM): no one
Saline CJR (11:27:22 PM): :::cough cough paranoid cough cough:::
Saline CJR (11:27:24 PM): jk
Saline CJR (11:27:28 PM): wait
someone (11:27:28 PM): lol
Saline CJR (11:27:31 PM): yse I do
someone (11:27:31 PM): maybe its true
Saline CJR (11:27:36 PM): I trust the ones I love
someone (11:27:36 PM): maybe i am paranoid
someone (11:27:43 PM): I dont trust the ones i love
Saline CJR (11:28:00 PM): If you want to truly love then that is a barrier that you will have to break through
Saline CJR (11:28:08 PM): what kind of love is that?
someone (11:28:13 PM): actually, i trust my father, but when i say i trust him
Saline CJR (11:28:14 PM): it is none that i know of
someone (11:28:27 PM): its My love
Saline CJR (11:28:41 PM): well
Saline CJR (11:28:52 PM): she, nor anyone else, works on your love
someone (11:28:59 PM): I love/loved my brother, and i cant trust him with anything 0%
someone (11:29:21 PM): i can trust you and the people i love 99%
someone (11:29:43 PM): but im not talking about the kind of trust like ... can you deposit 2000 dollars of my money into my bank account
someone (11:29:47 PM): jsut incase you are
Saline CJR (11:29:50 PM): It is something you are going to either change about everyone else, of you will need to change about yourself; and I really dont think it could every possibly be the former
someone (11:30:03 PM): i cant change myself
Saline CJR (11:30:11 PM): well than you cant live life
Saline CJR (11:30:23 PM): change is something that you have to do
Saline CJR (11:30:29 PM): you need to be flexible
someone (11:30:33 PM): i can change what i eat
Saline CJR (11:30:46 PM): you dont eat yourself
Saline CJR (11:30:48 PM): ...
Saline CJR (11:30:54 PM): or atleast I hope not
someone (11:30:57 PM): and i can change bad things, but things that i believe are good i cant change
someone (11:31:03 PM): not lately =)
someone (11:31:05 PM): j/k
someone (11:31:27 PM): and i believe that not trusting people completely 100% is a good thing
Saline CJR (11:31:28 PM): AND YOU BELIVE THAT YOU NOT BEING ABLE TO TRUST ANYONE IS A GOOD THING!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Saline CJR (11:31:35 PM): well
Saline CJR (11:31:39 PM): I cant change that either
Saline CJR (11:31:46 PM): but other people dont work like that
Saline CJR (11:31:58 PM): I think that that is a sucky deal
someone (11:32:01 PM): ah, not trusting anyone and not trusting some completly are two different things
Saline CJR (11:32:22 PM): a woman will put her full trust and devotion into you for you to just only Partially trust them
someone (11:32:37 PM): i hope no one trust me 100%
Saline CJR (11:32:44 PM): yeah, but most non-yous can trust people
Saline CJR (11:33:00 PM): I trust that you are telling me the truth on most things
someone (11:33:05 PM): because it will be a big let down when i do something untrustworthy
Saline CJR (11:33:12 PM): Exactly
Saline CJR (11:33:16 PM): but
Saline CJR (11:33:25 PM): if you dont keep saying that you dont trust everyone
someone (11:33:34 PM): and we all do things untrustworthy sometime in our life
Saline CJR (11:33:40 PM): and you know that there are people that you love and trust, life is a hell of a lot easier
Saline CJR (11:33:49 PM): yeah but they arnt THAT bad
someone (11:34:12 PM): for instance! Him1 and Him2 probally had full trust in me. and i let them down big time
Saline CJR (11:34:13 PM): the only untrustworthy thing that can't be forgivin is being untrustworthy
Saline CJR (11:34:31 PM): well, Him 1 and Him 2 let you down too
Saline CJR (11:34:54 PM): that was a too big a problem to have only been driven by one person
Saline CJR (11:35:15 PM): but let's please not get into that
someone (11:35:24 PM): they had every reason to let me down, although i dont believe in letting someone down because they let you down, but thats they way it goes
someone (11:35:27 PM): ok
Saline CJR (11:35:52 PM): YOU DONT GET IT APPERANTLY!!!!!!!!! YOU CANT LET SOMEONE COWN THAT YOU DONT FULLY TRUST
Saline CJR (11:35:58 PM): trust only goes so far
Saline CJR (11:36:06 PM): the limit on trust is life and
someone (11:36:18 PM): i dont get it i guess
Saline CJR (11:36:18 PM): i trust that my friends wont kill me
Saline CJR (11:36:23 PM): right
someone (11:36:26 PM): really?
Saline CJR (11:36:28 PM): for me, that is enough
Saline CJR (11:36:43 PM): "everything should be made a simpla as possible, but not more than that."
Saline CJR (11:36:47 PM): YES really
someone (11:36:51 PM): einstine
someone (11:36:54 PM): said that dident he
someone (11:36:58 PM): ?
Saline CJR (11:37:06 PM): I trust that you wont spin around in the movies and cap me in the head!
Saline CJR (11:37:10 PM): yes he did
someone (11:37:20 PM): my point is that happens and people cant control it
someone (11:37:25 PM): im sure you've lied before right?
Saline CJR (11:37:27 PM): you are right
Saline CJR (11:37:32 PM): but they can deal with it
someone (11:37:42 PM): sometimes
Saline CJR (11:37:58 PM): look at the past and say, "Look! It's the past! Who Fricken CARES!!!"
someone (11:38:08 PM): in my situation me, Him 1, Him2 couldnt deal with it
Saline CJR (11:38:15 PM): apperently not
someone (11:38:25 PM): i say LOOK its the past what have i done!?!?!?!?
someone (11:38:37 PM): i cant forgive myself
someone (11:39:07 PM): i dont think anyone really understands what happend with me during/after this Him 1/Him 2 fiasco.... and im sure i dont understand what happened to them
someone (11:39:13 PM): its a bitch of a thing
Saline CJR (11:39:25 PM): YES IT IS!
Saline CJR (11:39:30 PM): no one does understand
Saline CJR (11:39:38 PM): since we dont
someone (11:39:45 PM): you know, even though i disagree with a lot of what your saying, this makes me feel much better
Saline CJR (11:39:50 PM): the best thing to do is just to leave it be and say what happend happend
Saline CJR (11:39:59 PM): that's what friends are for
someone (11:40:13 PM): yeah, but i wasnt a friend
someone (11:40:15 PM): a friend wouldnt do what i did
Saline CJR (11:40:16 PM): My purpose in life is to help people
someone (11:40:19 PM): or woudl they!
someone (11:40:22 PM): because i did
someone (11:40:26 PM): and i dident want to
Saline CJR (11:40:29 PM): shut up
someone (11:40:33 PM): you think i like losing two friends
someone (11:40:33 PM): no
someone (11:40:37 PM): but i gained two also...
someone (11:40:46 PM): and my point being i couldnt control it
Saline CJR (11:40:59 PM): YOU THINK I LIKE WATCHING 3 OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS GET INTO A BITCH FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Saline CJR (11:41:09 PM): YOU ONLY HAV TO WORRY ABOUT 2 OF THEM
someone (11:41:29 PM): i have to worry about 3 because thats the way i am... Him 1, Him 2, and me
someone (11:41:44 PM): its just how i work, i know it sounds selfish, but its the way it is
Saline CJR (11:41:49 PM): IM STUCK HERE LOOKING AT BOTH SIDES AND WONDERING HOW I AM GOING TO DEAL WITH 2/3 OF MY CLOSEST FRINEDS HATING EATCH OTHER FOR THE REST OF THIER LIVES AND MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saline CJR (11:42:11 PM): it's not selfish, it's human reflex
someone (11:42:16 PM): see, i dident know you felt that way
someone (11:42:25 PM): although it dosent suprise me much
Saline CJR (11:42:26 PM): i dont going around in the ghetto not worrying about what I am doing
Saline CJR (11:42:59 PM): well thats how I feel
someone (11:43:04 PM): im glad that i know
Saline CJR (11:43:19 PM): I know that you and Him 1and Him 2 and all of my other friends have some sort of feeling for me
Saline CJR (11:43:37 PM): My trust consists of helping my friends in anyway possible
someone (11:43:42 PM): i dont Him 1 or Him 2, i wish they would be more forgiving thats really all
Saline CJR (11:44:02 PM): though when 3 of them start smacking eachother around, theres not much I can do without hurting the other one
someone (11:44:39 PM): all i try and do is make the people around me be as comfortable
Saline CJR (11:45:14 PM): see, I leave the people around me to be comfertable them selves, but if they need help doing it, then I will help them
Saline CJR (11:45:21 PM): We can draw lessons from the past, but we cannot live in it.
Lyndon B. Johnson (1908 - 1973), December 13, 1963
someone (11:45:43 PM): im stilll drawing my lesson
Saline CJR (11:46:02 PM): but right now, you are doing a field lesson
Saline CJR (11:46:09 PM): you are living in it still
Saline CJR (11:47:32 PM): you are more like Herb Caen
Saline CJR (11:47:37 PM): I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there.
Herb Caen
someone (11:48:06 PM): i really hope my life isnt in the past
Saline CJR (11:48:16 PM): so here is the best solution, noticed how I said best not easiest
Saline CJR (11:48:23 PM): Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807 - 1882)
Saline CJR (11:48:43 PM): well, If you keep worrying about what happend before rigt now than you are
Saline CJR (11:48:50 PM): right*
someone (11:48:54 PM): maybe
someone (11:50:04 PM): sometimes i just dont want to take a shower... i just ask why... why the hell do people change how they smell from their normal smell... im sure normally everyone smells close to the same, so why do they care if they smell like that
someone (11:50:26 PM): its such a waste of time, but then again, so is a lot of what i do
someone (11:50:34 PM): holy crap, its almost 12
Saline CJR (11:50:38 PM): SO IS ALOT OF WHAT EVERYONE DOES
Saline CJR (11:50:42 PM): ok
someone (11:50:44 PM): i know
It seems that many of my friends, when they get down, start putting them selves down. Now, this sounds so 3rd grade i know, but still. Then they go into that denial "I suck" mode. That is the #1 off Colin right there. It also ruins everyone elses day. Anyway, what is the point of a "loveing relationship" of you arn't going to get married? I mean come on! I am not going to "go out with anyone unless I really feel that they are someone that I could live with for a while. Then I would try to over the summer and see how things go.....Love is so ove ...ha ha ha
~Colin
Tonight, I am going to make my point in the form of a story type deal.
so, Here goes.......
As they walked, hand in hand, away from the fire; they casually swpped the normal conversation pieces. Watching as the calm tide slowly made it's ever rising climb to high tide, the sat in the cool summer's night, beach air. They passed through the usuall topics of happiness, love, friends, and family.
"What do you think about life?" She said. "Life? Like what?" " Like anything," she replied.
"O.K. Well...I think of life as a big game of Euchre." He explained. "Riiiiiight," she said, trying to see how this would work.
"Well, you are dealt your cards. Five of them. Each of them representing apart of you. Apperence, Mind, Spirit, household, and wealth. You partner is anyone that can help you win. Then Trump is called. Trump represents what the most important at the time. Sometimes you can change the outcome of your cards. Other times, you can't. Who ever wins is the most liked among the group of players (aka the world)."
"Wow," she said, "I guess it makes sense."
"It makes more than you think." He said
They then walked back across the beach towards the flickering pattern of lights and the endless chater of the ones they loved.
There is something about being human, that makes you want to succumb to all of your problems.
There's something about being mortal that makes you want to do everything quickly before we die.
There's something about being both that makes us need that little bit of reinsurance that is religion.
There is something about her that makes me forget about all of that and just love life how it is right now.
A little something a whipped up to stick in the fridge and save for later.
~Colin
Everything that a person does requires dedication. Anything. Big or small requires some extent of dedication. The difference is not on the task. It is how well suited someone is to that task. If one has done something before, It may take more or less dedication. It again depends on the task. It is the people who put alot of dedication into everything that they treasure that I envy, that I wish I could be like, that I wis they could reach out to me and give me just a scrap of thier apparently abundant knoledge and wisdom, for they have passed they final barrier. THey know exactly how much dedication it takes to put into things. They know exactly what to do and how to do it. They know how to teach the less fortunate how to do this, and they do. Very few of these "wise ones" exist. One might argue that none exist. Who can know. Only the person themselves would know, but since they know that there is always more knowledge, that they are not "wise ones". So I guess they don't exist, but that is of course more perception than reality. Then again, what is reality, but what we persieve it to be?
(by the way my quote of the day is: "What is reality, but what we, as induviduals, persieve with the help of our morals.")
Feel free to quote me, just give me credit.
~Colin
There are so many stages people go through. For example, the crises stage. Luckily, my crises involved me alone. I am currently trying to leave a crises not my own, but one that is screwing up life. People always learn from these. People get stronger. Emotionally and mentally, I am the nerdy skiny guy. Yes I have knowledge, but not experience. Experience has, and will hurt. I am ready........................................Julie, You are so much stronger than me.
~Colin
Is there a pattern?
Yes
There is always a pattern.
Everyone knows the pattern, the have it inside of the, they are apart of it. They just haven't discovered it for them selves yet.
Fire has a pattern.
Fire.
The bringer of life.
The destroyer of life.
Fire is Anger,
Anger that leaps and licks on the outside,
Anger that burns in beautiful rage on the inside.
Fire is Love,
Love that embraces and consumes all that encompasses it,
Love that is an aurora, burning from the center out.
Fire is happiness,
Happiness that leaps to new heights at every moment,
Happiness that eventually burns low but never out.
Fire is everything and everyone.
Fire is the beginning and the end.
~Colin
"Even as he looked at the girl and his heart started to pound faster, his brain cautioned him, he had not had good experiances with love in previous times. Love can break your heart, it can make you feel so lost and so confused that you don't care about your own life at all."
Ispired by the book Abarat
That's what it does, thats why I don't. I need to get stronger...
Quote by me. Feel free to use any of my stuff as long as my name is on it. Thank You.
If you know someone's name, you know them. People differ the meaning of "know" but it is only one word. It means to know. There. Though, though there are different degrees of "know". I know my mother more than anyone else. I know my friend pretty well. I know myself to some extent. and I know other people to some extent. I want to know people like I know me. That way I can bring them that much closer to happiness. Now matter what it does to me. I want the world to be happy.
-Colin
Latly I have found myslef thinking about the human race. One side of me says...
Man kind is an imperfect thing,
Emotions are plauges that reek pain and suffering among us.
Man is blind and can not see beyond his own morales,
He looks at the world through dirty, unfocused glasses.
Man Looks at a problem and says "What kind of work do I have to do to get it done",
he looks at everything as a chore only worth doing if he benifits.
The other part of me says...
Man is an imperfect but repairable thing,
Emotions heal and bring life to man.
Man can learn everything in the world,
He can clean the glasses through which he looks through.
Man can look at a problem and say, "Oh! That seems like I challenge!",
Man can benifit from the word and himself.
Then the other part says...
Yeah but I am right, you are just trying to be optimistic,
Too bad it doesn't work on the truth!
and the Optimistic part says...
You are just being arrogant
and the Arrogant part says...
Yes I am, but at least I am arrogant about the truth!
At one time in history, the greeks believed in muses. The definition of a muse is:
Greek Mythology. Any of the nine daughters of Mnemosyne and Zeus, each of whom presided over a different art or science.
The nine muses will be presented in this handy thiung I found.
Name Meaning of Name Domain Symbols
Calliope The Fair Voiced Epic Poetry Writing Tablet
Clio The Proclaimer History Scroll
Erato The Lovely Love Poetry Lyre
Euterpe The Giver of Pleasure Music Flute
Melpomene The Songstress Tragedy Tragic Mask
Polyhymnia She of Many Hymns Sacred Poetry Pensive Look
Terpsichore The Whirler Dancing Dancing with Lyre
Thalia The Flourishing Comedy Comic Mask
Urania The Heavenly Astronomy Celestial Globe
Now im sure that if the muses were real, their powers would be split in people. Like their funny and kinda good at music. I like to think that i can invite a muse to join me. For example, I really want to learn to play spanish guitar. for a few reasons i might add. 1) It is a difficult task and I need a challenge. 2) It is a cool thing to do at parties etc. 3) Chick Magnet, need I say more?
I have met people who just have ways with words. These people can write and write and never lose it. Me on the other hand can sometimes write about somethings. Sometimes I wish that I were better at somethings. I have decided that is is time to stop wshing and do something. So I will. Please, if you see an imperfection in something, do something about it.
With this I leave you: Love what you do. If you don't, do something you love.
~Colin
In many of Shakespeare's plays, the main character(s) have a tradgic flaw. Some times the flaw is one of love, or the sort. Love is such a hard topic and is the most confusing thing in life. When I see people, espescially people who think they know what they are getting them selves into, I just want to go up to them and say, do you think that you will be with her for more than a year?...Two?? I can just imaginge what they would say." uhhhh no?" Well why then are you "going out". By the way, what is going out when your in 7th, 8th, 9th grade? what are you going to do, ask her for a ride? walk to the reseraunt? i mean come on people! Some people say to trust experience. Yes, that is true. but thats the hard way. I am just sitting out and watching. I have made a vow not to get intrested in any one unitll my junior year, where I can drive and I go to prom, double score. I am doing this because of what one of my friends said to me when I was in 7th grade. (before my vow thing) I was "going out" with this one girl. and I dopn't know how many of you know what it's like to have a "girlfriend" at that age but people are realy big on gossip and making sure that everyone is having a hard time living peacefull. well anyway, trying not to be to humiliated, I wasnt to openly social with her..that is in public... and my friend said, "If you are going out with her why are you embarissed about it?" well that got me thinking. Now I am that much wiser. I prefer to watch and make friends (female) as I progress in my life. Life, being the bitch it is, is going to screw things up every once in a while. that is why I like the quote by Helen Keller:
"When one door closes, another opens; but so long do we look at the closed one, that we don not see the one that has opend before us."
for example, my friends got in a big ol fight and now they hate each other, well, I made a friend. Hey it's a plus. Anyway, I like to get my Bad-Ass meter up and think about what I will do with her before I do anything.
So as everything, think about it.
E-mail me at: Salinecjr@aol.com
~Colin
“People always say you should be yourself, like yourself is this definite thing, like a toaster, or something. Like you can know what it is, even. But every so often, I'll have like -- a moment, where being myself, and my life right where I am is, like, enough.” --"My So-Called Life
________________________________________________________________________________________________
"The Luckiest"
I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here
And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
What if I'd been born fifty years before you
In a house on a street where you lived?
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?
And in a white sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you
Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away
I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
Do some people think that they have presidence over other people?
well they do.
the thing is not the position they carry that increases respect, it's how they got there.
im just jotting down random subjects.
PLEASE
talk to me!
do that to other people. just talk to them and listen to what they have to say. sometimes they will have something important thing to say, and sometimes they are just bored.
OR
sometimes they have feelings or some kind (Good or bad) for the other person
secrets
secrets
secrets
"what secrets do we hold, that keep people guessing?"
What do we hold, and why. I hold secrets, for a bunch of reasons.
one being for fun
another is becuase i have honor and will hold my word
some people keep secrets becuase they are afraid of the consequences that would result.
im sad
my cat died
im listening to "Fred Jones Part 2"
-Ben Folds
Listening to it makes me feel pity for life.
then in the midst of the pity, I wonder why.
But who doesnt
Why are we here
Why do we do what we do
the only real explenation is = becuase we do
or = because I can
live life
help other people
make at least one part every day interesting
why
becuase we can
do it
One
We only have one of a lot of things.
One life
One Freshman Year
One Sophmore Year
One Junior Year
One Senior Year
One time when we are 7
One time when we are 70
People don't think about this or the fact that we can only do things once for the first time.
Please, anyone who reads this, Live life to the fullest.
Think of it like a test
A test to see if you can live life.
Don't miss out!
~Me
Salinecjr@aol.com
Day after day, alone on the hill,
The man with the foolish grin is keeping perfectly still.
But nobody wants to know him,
They can see that he's just a fool.
And he never gives an answer .....
But the fool on the hill,
Sees the sun going down.
And the eyes in his head,
See the world spinning around.
Well on his way, his head in a cloud,
The man of a thousand voices, talking perfectly loud.
But nobody ever hears him,
Or the sound he appears to make.
And he never seems to notice .....
But the fool on the hill,
Sees the sun going down.
And the eyes in his head,
See the world spinning around.
And nobody seems to like him,
They can tell what he wants to do.
And he never shows his feelings,
But the fool on the hill,
Sees the sun going down.
And the eyes in his head,
See the world spinning around.
-The Beatles-"The Fool on the Hill
"I am the Fool"
~Me
Trust
Trusting people is one of the hardest things to do, Ive noticed. This goes along with the privacy one. Why should we trust people? Why do we need to talk to people? I don't know. All I know is that there are some people we can trust and some we can't. Picking these (for me) comes sun concienceously. All I do is think, "has this person talked about someone behind thier back and truly ment it, or joked with out all knowing that they were?" It is hard telling a friend that i don't fully trust them, but if I don't trust them then I don't. Even if it is only one person that has really pissed them off, and the piissed off person rambles things about him/her, then they can't be trusted. For some day, for some reason, I could be that person. For what reason, i do not know, but it could happen. Why is it that people can hold grudges for even the littles things? I usually don't do that. I can only be mad untill I sleep (unless they REALLY mAKE ME MAD! then I hold it for two days) and then I forget about it. I don't understand people tonight. Please e-mail advice.
~Me
It's not so much that people don't listen. The problem lies in people caring when they listen. Everyone should have a person who them can talk to. If not, their thoughts are kept inside of themselves and their knowledge and wisdom is never revealed to the world. Micheal Fowling said that if you talk, it means that you are alive, if you don't... Anyway, I feel really primative and young when people hold back on me. I don't like it. If there is one thing that defines people from friend to good friend and person I can trust, is when they listen and understand me, and vice versa. Our world is full of lies, misstrust, and deception. A friend who listens is a rare thing. Hold close to you those who listen. If you just met them, get to know them. If you know them (or think you know them), get to know them better. If they are a friend, tell them and hold them dear to you. A good friend is rare in this world of ours. Be thankfull for the ones you have.
Your whole life, you have experienced sadness, happiness, and anger (duh). You see everything from your perspective. You see events of joy and sadness. When you meet/get to know someone (like Emily), it seems like a big thing. All of these things, including your ideas, added up are just monumental! Imagine that everything you know is put into a room. The room must have been HUGE!!! Now think of how may people there are in the world. Everyone has the same amount of events in their life. All of the 6 billion people in the world have the same kind of thoughts. So before you think why someone says or thinks something, think about it for a minute, have you ever thought about that. What made you think that. Doesn't that make you feel small.
I've noticed that at about the 5th grade, groups of kids start making fun of other ones. Those people (the make funners) tend to group together. Then in the 6th grade the other people start to hang around each other. This starts creating the cliques. It seems that when you single out any of these people, they wouldn?t mind to be with a person from another one of the their groups. Soon enough though, they won't want to. These groups form when one of these people decides that it would be funny if they made a joke about someone else. Then the other kids catch on and do it too. Then it continues; such as the quote by someone says," None of us is as dumb as all of us." This is pretty self-explanatory. It says then people can do really stupid things (at any age) when in groups of any size. We do this because of our masks (check previous entry). These groups change some but usually last until 8th-9th grade, then nobody cares any more. I have noticed that grades 1-4 and grades 11 and up, are very similar; in perspectives of people that is. I have never cared for these groups, at any time in my life. Though many people do. They see these people as their friend, though most of the time they aren't. This manipulates all in it. So the lesson of today is: don't be stupid (and I know that that is hard for many)
E-mail me
I had an assembly at my school the other day. The speaker was phenomenal. His name was Michael Fowling. He talked about many different topics. One of which was about the mask that people wear when they go places. The mask that hides their true feelings, attitude, personality, and sometimes emotions. I do feel bad that I wear masks to hide myself, but I also feel that it is better. I like to conserve my seriousness to when I need it. I am sure that if you think about it, you wear a mask also. These masks can spell glory or disaster, just depends on how you wear. I am constantly changing, modifying, and creating new masks. Just make sure that you know whom you are.
"Sometimes people carry to such perfection the mask they have assumed that in due course they actually become the person they seem.
W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965), The Moon and Sixpence
Please feel free to e-mail me and tell me how I am doing so far. Thank You
E-mail me
Pride.
Most people think of pride as the thing that makes them do stupid things in the face of danger. Some people also get pride and courage confused. Pride is the emotion that is us protecting our feelings. Courage on the other hand has lots of meanings. Courage could be doing right when everyone else is doing wrong, standing up to danger, and sticking up for other people. COURAGE IS NOT LOOKING FOR TROUBLE! Here is a quote I wrote myself (with a bit of help form Drizzt Do'urden): A person may walk alone, but never should he walk without friends. Also, people should know their surroundings and know where to find allies. People have too much pride when they think they don't need those things. The realization will hit them either when they figure it out or when they die by it. Yeah, I know that's kinda harsh....well it's really harsh, but it's true. Becoming so full of your self that pride is turned into foolishness (or what the person would call a mixture of intelligence and courage) is a HUGE mistake that many people take as a blessing. Well it's not. When someone thinks they have a lot of courage and pride, they go looking for trouble that could affect their pride. Thus destroying both. Just keep that in mind next time you want to pick a fight or do something stupid.
It's amazing how music can change our feelings instantly. It's also amazing how books can do the same. Books and music are very similar. They both tell stories and they both have they ability to change our mood.
To me, music is the most effective. Music (usually classical or John Williams type) has the power to make me see a lot of things in my minds eye. Plus it can change my mood if I listen to it enough. The thing that changes my mood is when there are some many different parts and things going on in the music, it just makes me feel so small and insignificant. There are only a few people that I have met that really appreciate music in that respective.
It's the same way with books, that is it can change the way I feel but books don't quite work the same way. For me, I get so into books that I completely forget what was bothering me (that is if it was something small or of reasonable size). I am totally into the fantasy genre. Those books take me into another world that give the reader perspective of another person, his troubles, and his solutions.
!!
That wasn't much of a "here take my advise", but just a little thing I thought of...check back soon ~
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